10 Years After Open-Heart Surgery

Yesterday, I logged into an old blog of mine from 2010. I had begun writing it as a means to keep my family and friends updated on my health. In February of that year I had a mini-stroke that lead to a dozen specialists conducting dozens of tests on a seemingly healthy 22 year old girl. After a week of tests and rarely being allowed to leave my hospital bed, the puzzle was finally solved. A tumor was sitting on my mitral valve and a tiny piece of the tumor had broken off and made it's way up to my brain, causing a mini-stroke.

Last night I stayed up pretty late reading all the posts I wrote before and after my surgery. And I was amazed. I was amazed to read about the work God was doing in my heart as I was walking through so many unknowns. I was amazed to read about all the prayer warriors that were interceding for healing on my behalf. I was amazed at the kindness and tender care provided from the hospital staff, friends, family and even strangers. As I was reading through each post I had flashbacks of that 22 year old sitting on those itchy, bleach white hospital sheets waiting to learn what her future would hold.

Doctors and nurses were in and out of my room the entire week. They were drawing blood, taking me for another MRI and other various tests. There was discussion about what type of valve replacement I would require. There were explanations for how the medication I may need would affect my fertility. There were even talks of how, if I choose a certain valve, I would require another open heart surgery in 8-10 years. The surgery itself, and what doctors would find, was not altogether known. They explained that during open heart surgery they would stop my heart and that I would be kept alive through a bypass machine. 

It would have been completely understandable if I was paralyzed with fear. But I wasn't. Yes, I was scared at times, but I wasn't consumed by it. And last night as I was reading through every word of every post, one thing was very evident: Christ was sustaining me. I wasn't an insanely strong human being and I didn’t just pull myself up by my boot straps and keep chugging along. But I had an entire army of brothers and sisters pleading with Lord on my behalf. They were praying for my physical healing. They were also praying that He would be my peace, hope and source of strength and that in all things God would be glorified. It was His grace overflowing into every corner of my heart that enabled me to trust Him. His loving and gracious hand was holding me above the raging waters. It wasn't that I was oblivious to my surroundings; I just had this peace-filled confidence. I knew that regardless of what was on the other side of this surgery, I was safe and secure in the shadow of His wings.

I had this overwhelming sense that someone else needed this reminder today. I know I did. Whatever you are going through right now - relationship challenges, parenting issues, financial hardships, health issues, grieving a loss, dealing with uncertainty and doubt - God will sustain you. That’s worth repeating. God sustains those who trust in Him. Dear friend, you also weren’t created to walk this road alone. Reach out to a friend and ask for them to pray with you. Prayer changes things. I’m a walking example.

With Love,
Kelly